I almost fell off the toilet at work yesterday. I couldn't decide if this little incident needed to be recorded for all to see, but then I figured why not? Who doesn't like a good bathroom story?
So I am in the bathroom peeing for the 26th time of the day. As usual, very little is actually expelled from my body. That little joke my body likes to play on me just doesn't get old. My bladder is a jerk.
Anyway, I am in the middle of contorting this Humpty Dumpty-type body in an attempt to dry all parts up after doing my business and the seat of the toilet shifts. I can only assume this shift is caused by the change in my less than dainty weight on the seat. The seat moving startled me. Scratch that. Scared the bejeezus out of me. I over corrected and just about launched myself right off the whole damn toilet. I imagine it looked a lot like when you lean back in a chair and all of a sudden it feels like the chair is going to tip over backward. Except my pants were around my knees and my shirt was pulled up over my big ol' white orca belly.
I am not cut out for being pregnant.
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