Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Peaks and Valleys

Of course I had to brag publicly about how proud I was of my son.  And of course the evening after I do that, I get an email from his teacher telling me he had a very hard time listening, following directions, and keeping his hands to himself at school that day.  And of course that email was received after his teacher at day care had told me the very same thing.  Good stuff.

I can't wait until this evening when I get to tell him the incentive/bribe of a new Octonauts bath toy is off the table.  He covets his cousins' Octonaut toys like Gollum and his precious, so I thought that would be a good motivator for turning on his listening ears and following directions.  Looks like I thought wrong.  This outta be a meltdown for the record books.

We also have to address a little issue of him making good decisions...especially when one of his friends is not making good decisions.  He usually does pretty well on his own, but if he's playing with someone that gets going down a naughty track, you can almost hear him thinking, "OH!  We get to do bad stuff now?!?!  Sweeeet!"  Apparently I am not raising a leader here.

Oh, tonight's gonna be so fun!

Monday, April 28, 2014


Alex and I made a trip to Chicago this weekend to hang out with my sister and her boys.  If the crying and whining when it was time to leave was any indication, I'm pretty sure the boys had fun together.

Before we left, there was a conversation about chores and earning money between Alex and Travis that centered mostly on Alex asking what he could do to earn money.  Travis quickly saw the empty dog dish and told Alex if he fed the dog, he could earn a little money.  "That's a great chore for me!"  So happy you're enthused little man.  Anywho, the dog got fed and Alex left for Chicago with a little change proudly in his pocket.

When we exited the freeway, there was a man walking between the lanes of cars with a sign asking for money.  Alex asked me what the sign said, and while being a total jerkstore and not giving this guy any of the gobs of change I had for tolls, I explained that the man was asking for money because he didn't have any.  And without skipping a beat, Alex said, "Well I have some money!  I can give him some of mine!"

I have never been so sad to see a light turn green.

Friday, April 25, 2014

Found it!

I had to run over to Bert's old house last night to make sure it was all cleaned out and ready for the closing today, so Travis was on dinner duty.  When I got home, I was met with glorious news!  He found the missing egg!  I was so excited and relieved.  I know it's silly, but it was driving me nutso that I couldn't remember where I put the damn thing.  My excitement quickly turned to I'm-gonna-slap-this-man when I asked where he found it and he responded with, "I'm not telling.  I want you to have the satisfaction of finding it."  He's a funny man.  A funny man that clearly holds little value for his life.  He sensed this was perhaps not the best course of action and said that I cook often enough that I would find it really soon.  Some quick deductive reasoning led me to the cupboard next to the stove, from which he had recently retrieved a dish for that night's meal.  And sure as shit, there was the egg.  Sitting right inside the cupboard door.

That was the only egg I hid inside something.  The only one.  I lack the ability to remember that I hid one stinkin' egg not in plain sight.  Not to mention, my darling genius child and I lack the searching skills to find an egg in a cupboard.  We're goin' places us Juliuses.

Snack Time!

Alex's 4K class has a snack schedule for the kids.  Meaning the kids get assigned a day every couple of weeks to bring in a snack for the class.  The kids get excited when it's their turn and it saves some money for the win.  So far Alex has taken string cheese and pudding cups.

This week it was his turn to take a snack on Thursday.  Because we're totally on the ball, Travis ran to the store Wednesday night to grab something.  He came back with cracker sticks and cheese and applesauce cups.  Aaaaaand a sheepish look because he couldn't decide what to get.  Which I found funny because before he left I had suggested GoGurts or pudding cups, and because...well, I's a snack.  This isn't an Earth shattering decision.  But in Travis's world, it was a big decision because he doesn't want his kid to "be the kid that brings a lame snack."  Oookkk...I think we're puttin' a leetle too much emphasis on this snack thang.

In the morning, I showed Alex his options and told him he could choose between the applesauce and the crackers and cheese to take.  He immediately asked where the GoGurts were because he had heard my suggestion the night before.  I told him he was lookin' at his choices...pick one.  He looked again, pointed to the applesauce, and said, " this like chocolate applesauce?"  After a brief moment of confusion, I realized he was asking if the applesauce was actually pudding.  No such luck kiddo.

After much deliberation, applesauce won out.  Mostly because it was heavier in his backpack and he could be much more dramatic about it I'm pretty sure.

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Rapidly Aging

So, apparently when you're over 35 and pregnant for the second time, or of "advanced maternal age," it is actually listed on medical paperwork like charts and stuff as "elderly gravida."  Elderly.  So...yeah...I'm just gonna leave that bullshit here.

Wednesday, April 23, 2014


There's not much to say but daayyyumm.  I am knocked all the way up.

Please disregard the superhero fist on the hip pose thing.  And the crooked picture on the wall.  It was early.  I was tired.  And my housekeeping/decorating skills are lacking.

Alex saw my bare belly the other day and told me my belly button looks like a crazy chicken.  It's not any where near popping out or's just kind flat.  Not sure what constitutes a crazy chicken appearance, but apparently I've got it goin' on.

Monday, April 21, 2014

Happy Easter!

The other day, I asked Alex what he thought the Easter Bunny was going to leave for him.  He looked at me like I was nuts and said, "I don't know...but it has to fit in an egg."  And in all my stupidity, I blurted out, "But what about your basket?  He can leave big things in your basket!"  Duh.  Duh duh duh.  I was off the hook.  I had a cheap, plastic egg filled Easter morning in the bag and I blew it!

But then I started thinking...what could fit in little plastic eggs?  Legos!  So, I got a small Lego set that has all the parts to build a construction vehicle and worker and a sleeve of plastic eggs.  I also got a basket, some chocolate, a $1 bubble wand, and a $1 foam airplane.  Easter for $23.  Yeah baby.

I hid the eggs and basket, and immediately decided Alex was going to think it was totally lame that the eggs were filled with Legos and not chocolate/candy.  This is not the first time I've totally psyched myself out on an idea.  Pretty much any time I come up with something I think is going to be an awesome present, by the time I give it to the person, I've decided it's totally going to flop.  Whatever, different issue for a different day.

Anywho, we got up Sunday morning and started looking for eggs and Alex's basket.  He found the first egg and opened it up and yelled, "The Easter Bunny brought me LEGOS?!?!?!  YES!"  YES indeed!  He was equally excited for each egg he opened that produced more Legos and when he found his basket and surveyed the loot, he proclaimed it to be the "best Easter day ever."

Only one hiccup.  I hid 12 eggs.  12.  And "hid" is a strong word for where these eggs were placed.  On top of a plant.  On the lid of the garbage can.  On the window sill.  Not a single one was actually hidden inside something.  All 12 were in plain sight.  Aaaaand I can't find one.  Luckily the missing egg was the one that had the four wheels for the vehicle and nothing else, so we swiped the wheels off of a different creation in the playroom and were able to complete our little Easter morning project.

But seriously, I can't keep track of a measly 12 colorful plastic eggs that I placed??  And I'm gonna be responsible for a baby soon.  Good good.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014


Ghriradelli dark chocolate is pretty much this baby's favorite thing ever.  That can be the only reasonable explanation for the massive amounts of said chocolate I have consumed in the past 24 hours.

On an unrelated, but still baby-centered note, I really hope Alex stays as cute about this baby once he's out and stealing attention from Beast Child #1.  Alex accidentally ran into me yesterday and stopped and was all, "Oh!  I ran into my baby brother!  I'll give him kisses.  Sorry baby brother (while kissing my belly)!"  I mean this was after he was poking my belly trying to wake the baby up so he could feel him moving around, but still, pretty cute.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Workplace Attire

You know you work in a super casual office when you chose to wearing leggings with boots and a long sweater because the leggings are currenlty one of three pairs of pants that fit you, and your coworker asks why you're all dressed up today.  We're nothing if not fancy in our little corner of the HVAC world.

Friday, April 11, 2014

Good Impressions

"I saw Alex outside playing, and you were yelling at him."

Yeah, that'll happen little neighbor girl that goes to the same daycare...that'll happen.

Thursday, April 10, 2014

Difficult Choices

The other afternoon I was trying to get Alex to agree to a walk/bike ride so I get the dog out for a walk.  He was busy playing with a multitude of NOT toys in the garage, so it was taking some prodding.  After about the third time I asked him, he came up to me all seriously and said, "Mom.  I have something to say to you that is going to be hard for you to hear."


"Iiiiiii wanna ride my dune racer to the park instead of going for a bike ride."

This kid kills me.

With Honors Undoubtably

4K did class pictures a couple weeks ago.  And since they do a little preschool graduation ceremony thingy at the end of the year, they had the photographer take "graduation" pictures as well.  I thought I was going to be able to wait to post this until June, but I can't.  I just can't keep this to myself.

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Math is fun!

Alex has come up with a new game to play with me while we're in the car, or avoiding falling asleep at bedtime.  It goes like this:

Alex:  What's 4+4?
Me:  8
Alex:  What's 8+8?
Me:  16
Alex:  What's16+16?
Me:  32
Alex:  What's 32+32?
Me:  64

And so on and so on...

At one point this morning in the car, the answer was 1,984 (obviously we had started a little higher than 4+4) and he was having a really hard time remembering that long of a number to be able to say it twice.  He tried a couple times and then just said, "Let's not do math anymore."  That's the Go Get 'Em attitude I'm trying to instill!

Monday, April 7, 2014

Making Friends

It was not horrible outside yesterday so we were all out putzing around in the garage and yard.  One of our neighbors walked by with her two kids, a boy about Alex's age on a kick-ass big wheel and a baby in a stroller.  We all waved hello and they kept on their adventure...for about 4 steps past our driveway.  It was there the little boy decided he wanted to meet Alex.  Yay!

It would be Yay! except my darling child loses all control of himself when put on the spot to, oh I don't know, have manners and properly meet someone.  So instead of coming over to where I was standing to meet this very nice lady and her very well behaved children, my son started running all over the yard like an escaped convict with the crazy in his eyes while intentionally "tripping" over nothing.  Aren't you happy you decided you wanted to meet him?  He did finally calm down enough to find out the boy's name is Landon and to show him stuff in the garage.  They played for about five minutes and then headed home for dinner.  As they were walking away, Alex told me, "It was really nice meeting Landis."

Total success.

Friday, April 4, 2014

Coulda Skipped This One

We hit a milestone in the Julius house last night.  Alex called me a name.  While slamming his bedroom door in anger.  Did he suddenly skip a bunch of years and become a moody teenager?  No.  I only let him watch one episode of "Paw Patrol."  That was it.  That was my horrendous offense.  And?  He and I had agreed that he would watch only one and then turn the TV off.  Believe me, my foolishness in thinking that my darling 4 year old would uphold his end of that bargain is as glaring to me as it is to you.  One of these times, it'll work...I just know it.  Last night was not that time.

He happily watched the episode while I started making dinner.  It ended, I instructed him to turn the TV off, he melted down.  Not surprising by any means, but annoying and frustrating by all the means.  So I left my chili prep and turned off the tv, and while ignoring the tantrum being performed in the living room, I calmly went back to the kitchen.  At this point, my darling son decided it would be in his best interests to take it upon himself to turn the tv back on.  Contrary to his belief, that was not a good idea.  So he was banished to his room for a quick time out to change his attitude.  And would you believe this?  He didn't want to.  Didn't I know that?  He didn't want to go to his room.  Weird, I don't remember asking if he wanted to.  So, I put him in his room and closed the door.  With that, he opened his door, screamed "No!  Doody!" and slammed the door.  

Now, I'm no scholar, but I have been getting pret-ty good at translating kids' words into their adult, real English counterparts.  Based on the context, intonation, and what I know his meaning of "doody" is, I'm a strong 99% sure he called me a shithead.  Awesome.

After a handful of angry words from me, a lot of crying from him, some more time in his room, and a long conversation about repsect, we're back on track.

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Who shares a brownie?

I made brownies the other day.  It's Alex's fault.  He spotted the Ghirardelli brownie mix at Costco and put in the cart.  Kid's got good taste in treats.  Anyway, after they had cooled slightly and we each had one, I put plastic wrap over the pan with the spatula in it for ease of brownie retrieval at a later time.  Travis was kind enough to cut them up and put them in a storage container and he washed the pan.  All of which is greatly appreciated in the morning when I'm packing my lunch and can just grab a brownie.  But holy shit he cut some huge brownies.  The following text conversation may have occurred:

Me:  While I really appreciate you cutting up the brownies and washing the pan, why did you make them so huge?  You have witnessed my lack of will power.  That was a lot of brownie.

Him:  I believe they are cut into "sharing size."

Me:  Well...then I shared...with the baby.