Thursday, February 25, 2010

Probably T.M.I.

This morning when I dropped Alex off at daycare I had a conversation that I honestly never imagined I would have. I engaged in about a four minute conversation about poop. And not just any poop...Alex's poop. Consistency, frequency, what seems to be normal and abnormal for him. It was riveting.

There was one thing I chose to not talk about. At least with daycare. This morning when I was changing his rotten smelly poo filled diaper, there was this one piece that seemed to be hangin' on for dear life. But kinda dangling, like a smelly little butt ornament. So I grabbed a wipe and grabbed the piece in an effort to un-dangle it. And then I realized why it was dangling. There was an end of a piece of my hair in the middle of this little poo nugget. And the rest of the piece of my hair? Yeah, that was still in my little beast baby's butt. So I pulled. The whole time just wishing it wasn't so. But yes, that is how I started my morning. Pulling a piece of my hair out of my child's butt. I think I am going to start wearing a hair net.

Wednesday, February 24, 2010


Well, the sleeping through the night isn't perfect, but it's getting better...slowly.

On to other things. Well, I guess back to other things for those of us that are keeping track. Eating. This kid is a monster. He loves loves loves food. He is getting fairly good at grabbing the spoon and getting it into his mouth. I have video to prove it Dad. It will be posted as soon as I remember to download it!

Anyway, he has started something new while eating. He sits in his little Bumbo chair and after he swallows each bite he starts opening and closing his mouth making this little popping noise, all the while looking for the next loaded spoon. He looks like a fish right before you feed it. When it can see the food can through the tank and it starts looking around for the falling pieces of deliciousness. That's the look. Then when he gets the food, there is a big sigh and "mmmmm". With every bite. Like, Ah..that bite..that one right there..that was the BEST BITE EVER.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Fingers Crossed

Saturday night was more of the hellishness of not sleeping. He went down fine. But that can be attributed to the car. We were at my parents' for my mom's birthday and left right about the time he needed to go to sleep. Well, a little after that time but whatever. There was raspberry pie there. 'Nuff said. Anyway, he fell asleep pretty quickly in the car and barely woke up when we took him out of his car seat and put him in his crib. I was all for just letting him sleep in his car seat. Travis not so much.

All was good until 2:30. And 3:00. And 3:30. The first wake up I re-nuked him and went back to bed. The second wake up I cave and picked him up and rocked him for a while. But then when he started crying about .4 seconds after I left the room from rocking him, I had had enough. So I let him cry again. I went upstairs and turned the sound off on the monitor. Our monitor has a little light display that goes off when there is noise. And the more noise, the more lights that get all red and shiny. All the lights were shining. Now this would be a nice feature for someone who has a house bigger than a Barbie playhouse. We would not be those people. Don't get me wrong. I really like our house a lot. All 1009 whopping square feet of it. Add the diminutive size of our house to the fact that the screaming howler monkey's room is at the base of the stairs that lead up to our room...turning the sound off did nothing. It took him awhile, but Travis finally woke up...laid there for a bit and then just says, "So I take it we are toughing it out?" Yepper! Exciting, no?

And tough it out we did. For 30mins. And then he was quiet for a second. But then he started up again, but with a different cry. This time it was a "something's really wrong" cry, not just a "I'm pissed off" cry. So I went down to check on him. He was fine. Completely uncovered, but fine. So I covered him and gave him his nuk and watched him curl up and go to sleep while I walked out of the room.

And then Sunday, he was completely back to normal. Back to the routine of playing for a bit in his crib and then going to sleep. For two naps, an hour and half each, and for bed time. He cried for 24 seconds in the middle of the night, but went right back to sleep. For the whole night.

I don't want to count any chickens before they are hatched, but I am really really really happy that I think I can hear them peeping and pecking at their shells to get out.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

That was fun

The beast side of my lovely little bundle of joy came out in full force Friday. And into Saturday morning. Out of nowhere, Alex decided he doesn't want to sleep. EVER. I got a message from daycare at 1pm that he had only slept for 30 mins since I dropped him off at 7:45am. Not enough sleep for that little guy. When I got there to pick him up, I looked at his little daily report card only to see that he only took one more 30min nap all day. And shockingly, he was fussy most the day. Weird right?

So last night we went about our normal business. And then bed time came along. And the world ended. He was good for about 10 minutes in his crib by himself. But then he got pissed. I think it took him that long to realize that I hadn't just left him in there to play for a bit. After several failed attempts of getting him asleep without picking him up, I caved. I gave in. Not the right move, but the move that needed to happen at the time. So with about 15 mins of holding him swaying in the living room, he finally passed out. Until 1am. And then t was like de ja vu. Nothing was making him happy as long as it involved him sleeping. A lot of rocking and some teething tablets later, back in the crib he went. He woke up at 4:30 and ate an entire bottle and passed back out, but was up to play at 6:30am. Which is fine, I suppose. That is his normal wake up time. I still do not understand why children refuse to sleep later than a rooster on a farm but whatever.

So we played for a while and around 8 he was just starting to look sleepy so I thought, Aha! We will have a bottle and then drift off to sleepy town. Perfect! Yeah right. So nice of you to think you had a good plan there Mom. You are so smart.

The bottle went well. He ate the entire thing. But then all of a sudden the curtain was the coolest thing ever. And when I laid him in his crib he started flailing like a fish on the deck of a boat and laughing this maniacal laugh. Shit. So I did it. I gave him his blanket and his nuk and I left the room. Once again the End of Days arrived in the Julius house. But this time, this morning, February 20th, 2010...I stood my ground. I knew he was tired. I knew he needed a nap. I knew I couldn't continued down the road of always rocking him to sleep. I knew I had to let him figure it out. Which is a really nice way of saying I let him screaming like a trapped hyena until he fell asleep. 35 minutes later.

35 minutes of constant screaming. Every now and then it would dull to a low roar and I would think, At last! He's going to fall asleep. HA! Within a half of a second he would rev right back up to full hyena. For 35 minutes. And then all of sudden, he stopped and was totally asleep. It was glorious.

The thing is, I knew letting him cry was going to be hard. But I thought it was going to make me sad. I thought it was going to break my heart to listen to my baby cry knowing I could stop it at any time. But it didn't make me sad. It made me frustrated and mad. The whole time I was in the kitchen, listening to him cry, cutting some grapefruit and making some food for him. And I was just getting more and more frustrated the more he cried. I am guessing when I yelled, "Just fucking go to sleep!" it wasn't the most helpful advice I could yell to my baby, but shit! It was making me nuts! When he finally fell asleep I wanted to run in his room and be like See? SEE?! I knew you were tired! Because that is super mature. Nice that I can't get beyond proving an infant that he was wrong and I was right.

And now the slimy tentacles of guilt that it didn't make me sad that he was sad is creeping in and grabbing on to my brain like a giant squid. What kind of a mom am I that it did nothing but frustrate me that he was crying for so long? A tired mom I guess.

So yeah, "Cry It Out"? Super fun.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Hungry Hungry Hippo

It is so nice to have Alex back to normal now that the RSV crap-ola has left his little body. When you are dealing with a sick kid, it is kinda easy to forget what their normal personality is like. And damn. This kid has got personality. He is once again super giggly and smiley. And is even more chatty than before. I so wish I could understand what he saying. His toys are continuously getting a very intense talking to. As is my necklace. He will sit on my lap playing with my necklace with his chubby little fingers, talking to it forever. Cracks me up.

His curiosity is growing what seems to be daily. He wants to touch e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g. And since he is still stationary, this is not a problem. I think the curiosity is going to be a huge motivation factor for him to figure out how to be mobile though, so we are keeping a close eye.

He has found a new fascination with his bottles as well. Not so much that he wants to hold his bottle while he eats. Oh no. He is a king that deserves nothing short of being fed by his minions. Seriously, the splayed out position he takes when he is eating is ridiculous. Very much "Ah yes. It is time for you to be so lucky to feed me." However, those curious little hands are also busy grabbing, pushing and pulling. The other morning he pushed the bottle out of his mouth and before I could tip it up he grabbed the nipple. Which was full of formula. Which in turn squirted that formula right in his face. Call me a bad mom, but I could nothing but sit there and laugh.

The other thing that is back now that the sickness is gone...his appetite. I cannot believe how much he is eating. He is going to through six bottles, two servings of solids, and sometimes some puffs EVERY DAY. I don't get how that much volume of food can fit in such a tiny little body. And tiny it is. I weighed him last Sunday and he is still only 17lbs. So I am happy he is eating more, but holy cats! He is way too young to be eating us out of house and home already!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Oh thank you honey.

I finally went to the doctor yesterday to figure out what the hell is going on in my face region. Turns out the lovely little cold my lovely little beast gave me turned into a not so lovely giant sinus infection. I have never had a sinus infection. I would like to offer my most sincere condolences to anyone that has ever endured this nightmare. It is horrendous. Beyond horrendous. I feel like my face is full of little demons trying to get out from the inside...using tiny spiked jackhammers. All the while my brains are trying to escape out of my eyes and ears.

Alex is all but completely over this cold. Which is awesome because sick babies are no fun. But he wants to play...with toys...that make noise. I never really thought about how much it would suck to be sick and have a baby in the house. really really sucks. The one good part is he goes to bed super early, so I don't have to entertain him for too long before I get to collapse on my couch. Silver lining baby.

K, I think I am going to go remove my head for a while.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Where'd you go?

I think separation anxiety is beginning to rear it ugly head. This weekend, Alex was unhappy with people other than me holding him. Except for Kari. He was just generally unhappy with Kari. Unless she was more than four feet away. Then he would smile and flirt with her. But 3'10"? Screaming bloody murder. She can be scary.

I am not happy about this. I know it is some sort of developmental thing that kids go through, but I don't want him to go through it. I liked being able to hand him off to people and have him be happy. It is a good feeling that he feels safe with me, but c'mon man.

This cold thing just seems to be getting worse and worse and it really didn't like being fed sushi and a couple glasses of wine on Friday night. It would have been nice to be able to puke in peace on Saturday morning. But no. The second Claire took him so I could deal with my sick ass, he started screeching like a monkey with its butt on fire. Not cool man, not cool. Barfing up wasabi is bad enough on its own. But having to do it to a symphony of baby screams makes it burn just a little bit more.

Same thing later that day at lunch. He was all cool hangin' out with the long as I was holding him. Nobody else was allowed to touch him. His terms, not mine. I would've gladly handed him over.

I am hoping this is something that passes quickly. I am all for him getting the Stranger Danger thing, but I really want him to be ok with people he arms are getting tired.

Thursday, February 11, 2010


Alex is officially branded an outbreak monkey. I do not believe him to be the source though, so maybe we can downgrade him to just a carrier monkey. But this lovely illness he caught at daycare is a jerk. Travis and I totally have it. And remember when Mariah was so nice to come and play with Alex so I could get a haircut? Yeah....about that....she informed me that she too is now sick. Excellante! The little carrier monkey is just about over it, just a little coughing here and there.

How many times can you use the "good thing he's cute" line before it no longer works?

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Like Nothing Ever Happened

Yesterday's horribleness is almost completely healed already. The bump is almost totally gone and although it looks horrendous to me, the bruise really isn't all that bad. And if you ask Alex, he doesn't even remember what happened. I think. Either that or he is just being nice to me because I still feel so bad. I cannot get the picture of him laying on the floor out of my head and every time I think about it, it makes me sick to my stomach. For being a "bouncing baby boy" he didn't bounce very much.

Anyway, he is fine. I will be fine with some time to get over it. But no, the bouncy seat was not used this all.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

First time for everything

This first is one I could have done without.

This morning I had Alex in his bouncy seat on the kitchen table. All was going great. I was just about to dive into a bowl of corn flakes and bananas. I turned around to put the milk away and heard the worst sound ever imaginable. A thud. And a millisecond later a very high pitched and loud scream. I spun around to see my precious little beast baby in a little ball ON THE KITCHEN FLOOR. Yeah...he fell forward out of his bouncy seat off the kitchen table FACE FIRST onto the floor. How could this happen you ask? Because I suck that's how.

When I put him in the seat on top of the kitchen table, I absentmindedly didn't buckle him in. Because why would that be an issue? He's only about four feet up in the air. Who needs buckles? I even noticed how well he was sitting up in the chair and commended him on it with a, "Look at you sitting up so strong!" Not once did my brilliant inner voice say, "Hey dumbass! Buckle your infant into the seat!...Yeah, the seat that has the buckles and the safety strap, that one, you moron!" Nope. Nothin'. So I let him sit in there without any safety measure whatsoever. In a chair, on the kitchen table. And that chair even has a giant warning on the back of it: To prevent falls DO NOT place chair on an elevated surface. An elevated surface? Like, I don't know...A FUCKING TABLE?!? Maybe I should just put him on top of the TV armoire next time.

My guess is that he must have reached forward for a toy and just kept on a-going. Until splat.
To add injury to injury, his pacifier fell out first and his forehead landed on that. I think that is actually the only part of his face that experienced any impact. But it left a big dark grey dent on the upper left side of his forehead. Which quickly turned into a big bump with a big dark grey dent on the upper left side of his forehead.

Initially I was handling it well. I scooped him up and held him tight telling him everything was going to be ok. I called Travis in from shoveling. But the second I started explaining what had happened to make this kid scream bloody murder, I lost it. So there I am standing in the kitchen, explaining to my husband how much of an ass I am, crying about as hysterically as the child that face planted on the floor. Because that totally helps. Travis handled things much better. Although I did almost kill him when he asked why I didn't buckle him in. Oh gee, I don't know. I thought it would be a good exercise in the laws of gravity.

Once again the daycare teachers proved to be awesome. They assured me they would keep a close eye on him. They also assured me that things like this happen all the time. It's all part of the having a kid thing. While their assurances were very nice and slightly settling, I continuously sought out more...from Kari, my mom, my sisters..pretty much anyone that would listen and tell me although it sucks, it is going to be ok.

And then daycare sent me a picture. Alex in a jumperoo, giant smile on his face...and you can barely see the bump.

Monday, February 8, 2010

On the getting better track

This weekend that RSV shit had a hayday in Alex's chest, throat and head. It totally and completely sucked. I thought the sleepless nights on Thursday and Friday were bad. HA! Saturday marked the worst night of our baby-ified lives yet. Well, my baby-ified life. I decided to be nice to Trav and just sleep on the couch with the monitor downstairs. No point in both of us getting no sleep. Aren't I sweet? It doesn't happen very often, so let's all take note. I do have to mention Travis sleeps so heavily that most times I have to wake him up to go deal with the I am up anyway and hearing everything through the monitor. At which point I usually end up having to pee anyway. Short story long, it is just plain easier for me to get up.

Alex went down around 6:30 or so was sleeping well. Until 10:30. Then and for the rest of the night, he would not sleep unless I was holding him. Believe me I tried mightily to put him down. I would let him get to the point of sleeping so soundly he was snoring. Yes, my baby snores sometimes. Cutest. Thing. EVER. Anyway, he would be sound sound asleep and I would gently place him in his crib. The second I was not touching him...crying. No joke. I gave up and just decided to "sleep" on the couch with him on my chest. I had myself positioned rather oddly because of smothering and baby dropping fears. The odd positioning did not yield a comfy head position. At one point I crammed my head between two back cushions so I could stop the head bobbing thing. I did not sleep well. AT ALL.

Last night, I was asleep immediately after the Super Bowl ended. The last number I saw on the clock was 9:03.

I am pretty sure the sickness is about done being a jerk to Alex's system. He only woke up once last night. And with a very small amount of soothing, was back asleep until this morning. It was glorious.

Friday, February 5, 2010

That settles that

One of the kids in Alex's daycare has "RSV." I Googled it and it basically is pretty much a bad chest cold. You have to be careful when little ones have it though because it can easily lead to bronchitis and pneumonia. Fun. Yesterday, Alex was a bit sick. Nothing horrendous, but sick. Last night was another long night. Lots of coughing and waking up. I spent a decent amount of the night in the glider in his room with him in my lap. Luckily my mom and dad spoil me and gave us a very nice one!

I brought my work stuff home with me yesterday in case I had to stay home. This morning, Alex was in a great mood and ate a good portion of his bottle. So I was thinking maybe I would take him after all. But then while he was sitting on my stomach playing he started coughing. And coughing and coughing. Until he gagged himself. And threw up every last bit of the 6 ounces he just drank. On my chest. Yeah...not so much on the going to daycare.

So I worked from home today. With a sick kid. And a dog that wants to be outside, no outside...but it looks warm inside...but there are dogs to bark at outside...but OH MY GOD DOG. BE STILL. And work was busy. I think I need a drink.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Baby sneezes are still cute

So it's been a little over a month since Alex has had any sort of sickness. It's amazing how quickly one can forget how much it COMPLETELY SUCKS having a sick baby. He is not super sick by any means...some coughing and sneezing and a very mild fever that comes and goes. But you add that to two front teeth that are all out refusing to pop through and you get one uncomfortable little man. Yesterday there was a lot of whimpering, some crying, and very little eating. And being the stellar mom that I am, I left him with dear sweet Mariah so I could go get a haircut. Because why wouldn't I leave my sick kid at home with a babysitter? Mommy needs her pretty time! Proof of how great of a mother I am. Impressive no?

Lucky for me Mariah loves all things baby. Even though he was all cranktified and sick, she got some good snuggle time in, which I will tell you is like gold. Especially coming from that kid. He so rarely snuggles, any little snuggle you get should be documented and cherished always. But alas, after the snuggling she went home and left us with an almost asleep, sick, fidgety baby. Well...she left Travis. I was still busy getting purple streaks put in my hair and getting a scalp is so hard being me.

But later the night of sick sleep began. And ended at 10:40pm. And began at 10:43pm. And ended at 12:30am. Began at 12:42am. Ended at 3:34am. Began at 3:37am. Ended at 5:00am. Bottle. Yay. Oh yeah, the dog got up every time too. She's so supportive.

As you might guess, we four Juliuses are a sleepy bunch today. Unlike the dog and Alex, Travis and I don't get a nap. I really really want a nap...for like the whole day. Make it happen.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Bringing the Thunder

I have finally gotten this video downloaded. This is the night that Travis described our sweet little baby boy as "Bringin' the Thunder." I love the fact that he takes little breaks to make sure I am watching him. With a look like, "Can you see ok? Are you catching my awesomeness?" I also like the fact that you can't hear the music the toy is producing at all because that sweet little baby boy is kicking the shit out of it and in turn banging his crib against the wall.

I think it is safe to say this was a good gift. I think he likes it.

Monday, February 1, 2010

The heart shredding look

We have the morning routine down pretty pat now. Pretty much the only variance in the routine is if Alex takes a nap or not between waking up and when we have to leave. But this morning he added an element I wasn't expecting. And holy shit was I not ready to deal with this new element.

When I was leaving daycare, he watched me leave. He didn't seem necessarily sad about it, but was watching like, wait a minute...where are you going? It was a lot like the look Aiden gives me when I leave and she isn't coming with me. It is a kinda sad, but quizzical look. It breaks my heart every single time she does it. She just stands there in the kitchen with her furry little head tilted to the side like, "Why can't I come with you? I love coming with you! Why don't you love me anymore?" And that is exactly how it feels. It feels like you are telling them you don't love them. Like, "No no, you stay here...I have more important things to do than spend time with you." It sucks. And the worst part is, I know it is only going to get harder. When he goes through the crying when I leave thing, I think I am just going to remove my heart all together and leave it at home. Yes, that will be easier. Although with how much he loves the teachers and other kids at his daycare, it wouldn't surprise me if he never goes through that stage. Today I handed him over and his teacher had him all out belly laughing in .4 seconds.