Thursday, January 30, 2014

That damn fox

There are many parody videos of the glorious "What Does the Fox Say?" video, but there is one in particular that Alex is keeping on the internet with his view count alone.  "What Does the Farmer Say?" is frequently requested and watched at our house.  It was funny to me the first time I watched it.  After the bazillionth viewing, I'm kinda over it.

Two nights ago, he asked if he could watch it.  I told him he could, but he could only watch it once.  I just didn't have it in me to have that on repeat in the kitchen.  He agreed that once would satiate his need.  He got all the way to end and said, "I just need to back it up a little bit."  And with one swipe of his finger, his little back up took the video to the beginning...and he pretended that was an accident.  Yeah, right, ok.

After the second viewing, I told him to turn it off.  He begged to watch it again.  I told him I had said he could watch it once and he already "tricked" me into letting him watch it twice.  He begged.  I said no.  He begged.  I threatened to lose the tablet for a week.  He began his full body fit.  We argued for a bit.  The night went on.

At bedtime, he trotted upstairs to brush his teeth.  I followed about a half minute behind in an attempt to stop any rampant toothpaste consumption.  I walked into the bathroom to find him rummaging through the bathroom drawers singing, "Where is my tooth - paste?" to the tune and beat of "What Does the Fox Say?"  His little head bobbing along to the rhythm while he searched.

That might earn him another viewing.

Hair

Since I am already beyond dumb in Alex's eyes, he didn't believe me when I said some boys have ponytails.

I'd like to say I looked for photographic evidence to show him people can wear their hair however they want and to make him aware that he shouldn't allow himself to get caught up in gender stereotypes.  I'd really really like to say that was my motivator.  But it totally wasn't.

The only reason I got my phone and found pictures of men with ponytails was to prove that little shit wrong and to show him I know what I am talking about...at least some of the time.

Aaaand it didn't hurt that I got to look at multiple pictures of Brad Pitt and Chris Hemsworth.

And Bingo was his name-o!

So we have put together a list of names.

In alphabetical order:
Bryce (yuck, but Travis likes it so it's here.)
Carson
Carter
Elliot
Ian 
Miles
Oliver
Owen
And last but far from least, Travairius.

So far for me, Carson and Carter are my second string and Bryce is benched for the season...but the others are up for grabs.

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Nothing to see here

Alex has started a new thing when he wants to do something he knows he's not supposed to...he actually tells me to look the other way. Or, taking it one step further, he will physically try to push my face to force me to look in a different direction.  Like if I'm not looking directly at him I won't know he's doing something naughty.  Child, I have known you long enough to know you are pretty much ALWAYS doing something naughty...I don't need clear line of sight to determine that shit.

Tuesday, January 28, 2014

A boy and his best-disgruntled-old-annoyed-fine I'll sit here for a split second-dog friend.


Friday, January 24, 2014

The Man with One Red Shoe

Alex came home from his first day of 4K missing a glove and a shoe.  He wears his snow boots to and from 4K and puts his shoes in his backpack.  Well, he supposed to put his shoes in his backpack.  Wednesday, only one made it.  And when I asked him where he other shoe was, he replied, "Hmmmm....that miiiiiiight be at my school."

And that was the most I could get out of him about his day both days.  Every time I have asked him to tell about what he did at 4K, even when I was asking about their field trip to a pet store, he shrugs his shoulders and says, "I dunno."

School has aged him already.

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

First Report

He has been done with his first day of 4K for less than an hour, and we already got an email from his school.  I am trying so hard not to cry at my desk right now...

Dear Jackie & Travis,

Alex had a wonderful first day today!! He did a great job following our routine, and he even participated a lot at group times! He completely melted my heart when we went to center time and about five minutes in he said “4K is even funner than I thought!”.  How adorable is he!?

Sincerely,
Ms.Kristin & Ms.Tiffany J


Big day.

It's a big day for us today.  It's Alex's first day of 4K.  AND I had my 20 week ultrasound today.  Apparently we are really diggin' on smashing big moments into teeny tiny time frames.

First things first.  Alex's first day.  He was so excited this morning.  He was like a little Mary Katherine Gallgher...every time someone would greet him this morning, he would roll his arms up in his shirt, start uncontrollably hopping, and announce, "I'm going to 4K!"  He has been patient beyond my wildest expectations while anticipating this day.  And it's finally here.  I cannot believe it.




And then there's the other one...Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the first "photo" of Travairius Robert Julius:

The "Travairius" part of the name is my dad's current name for the 2nd beast child...preeeeeetty sure it's not going to stick.  The Robert part is though.  Now we just have to come up with a first name.  It only took us until Alex was three days old to name him, so I figure we have some time.  He has the appropriate number of all the different parts and was squirming all over in there the whole time.  So, he's already a spitting image of his brother.  Heaven help me.

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

But Mom...

The arguing.  Oh my goodness the arguing.  I cannot take it.  Everything out of mouth, Alex argues it.  And it isn't just normal things like when it's bedtime or that he needs to finish his food.  He argued with me today about what the side of a yogurt container said.  I read it and told him it said it was 0% fat.  He immediately told me, "No.  That's not what it says.  It says it costs zero bucks."  Well, ya got the zero part of that right there kiddo...but until you hone your reading skills, I suggest you don't tell me I am wrong.

Every time he argues with me, it's the same routine.  I say something, he says the opposite, I tell him to please not argue with me, he puts his hands out in front of himself in a "stop" position, closes his eyes because he clearly can't stand to actually see my stupidity, tilts his head back a little and says, "But Mom, but Mom, but Mom."

Oh!  And back to that yogurt.  We were in the store and he picked out a strawberry banana yogurt.  Before he put it in the cart, I reminded him that he doesn't like that flavor.  Not shockingly, he retorted that he does now in fact like strawberry banana, and that he is "used to it now."  So, instead of perpetuating the Grand Cycle of Argue, I let him get the stupid yogurt.  Everyone see where this is headed?  Yep.  He was home from school today and at snack time he was all excited to have, you guessed it, strawberry banana yogurt.  He took one bite and with his hand on his head in disbelief, he said, "Ooooohhhh...whoops!  I forgot I actually don't like this flavor."  Really?  I cannot believe that.  It's almost like I told you that and you refused to believe me!  Weird!

The other morning, I was trying to get us out the door on time.  It's a whopping 4 minutes to day care since we moved so you would think this wouldn't be a challenge.  But it is.  We are not morning people us Juliuses.  Anywho, we were all on schedule until I asked Alex to put on his shoes.  That was when the argument about his ability to put on his own shoes began.  And that spiraled into four other things I apparently knew nothing about.  Whatever, I finally got him in the car, but I was not a happy lady.  Alex asked me what was wrong and I told him I was upset that we were late because he spent so much time arguing with me.  And with that he was quiet.  Until we had to wait to turn off of our road.  There were a lot of cars coming and he piped up with, "Mom, all these cars are going to make us late late late."  And that's when I decided to argue.  I like to think of it as clarification, but let's not split hairs.  So I told him, we were not late because of the cars, we were late because of the constant disagreeing. Once again silence from the back seat.  About 1/4 of a mile down the road, I hear it.  "But Mom...this truck in front of us is going reeeeeally slow and that is going to make us late."

And when I told him that if he didn't stop arguing with me, I swore I was going to lose my mind?   "You're not supposed to swear, Mom."  Geez, I'm surprised you didn't know that.

Monday, January 20, 2014

So relaxing...

There just really is nothing that compares to trying to make it through my work day during the busiest time of the year, while at home because my child randomly puked this morning.  You'd think the boss here would be more forgiving.

Friday, January 17, 2014




Who needs pants?  Not this kid. Video watchin in style.

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Speaking of getting older...

I have a cold.  It hit me like a Mack truck on Sunday night.  I'll deal with it, whatever.  But, this particular cold has brought with it a whole lot of sneezing.  Add that to the constant pressure on my bladder from the now bell pepper sized beast child residing in my body and I peed when I sneezed last night...but I didn't realize it until I went to the bathroom for the 12,934,875th time.

Just aim me in the direction of the nursing home and shuffle me along.  They can deliver babies there, right?

Growing up

Well, it's set.  Alex starts 4K next Tuesday.  I cannot believe he is old enough to go to school.  And real school; not just day care that we occasionally call school.  His excitement has increased exponentially since we found out he will be riding not one, but TWO buses.  The main location, at the one school, is at capacity, so he is going to a satellite location.  So the bus will pick him up from day care with the other kids, stop at the one school where he will get onto a transfer bus and then head over to the location he has been assigned.  Lots of excitement for those not quick enough to get into the main location.

I wanted to tell him right away to ease us into the change.  Well, mostly to ease me into it but whatever.  So I told him I talked to the school and he can start 4K.  He immediately started shouting that he was going to 4K tomorrow.  Ummm...yeah...about that.  I broke it to him that he couldn't start until next Tuesday and he collapsed into a pile of disappointment right there on the kitchen floor and started moaning that he's never going to get to go to school.  I tried to circumvent the melt-down by telling him he only had 5 more day care days before he would start 4K and I was promptly told that each day is going to take at least 16 minutes and that's "like forever."

Between starting school, his dramatic antics, and the fact that his baby belly is suddenly stretched out and missing, this kid is growing up super fast.

Sunday, January 12, 2014

Only one straw per smoothie is no fun any way.

Grand Theft Auto

None of these vehicles were given to my son, yet all of them came home with him last weekend from his aunt and uncle's house.  Add these to the two I found that he swiped from his other cousins and we have a problem.

Saturday, January 11, 2014

What are you made of?

"Hey Mom, do you know what Cinnamon Toast Crunch is made of?"
"What?"
Adding a finger with each ingredient, "cinnamon, toast, and crunch."

 This kid is going places.

Friday, January 10, 2014

Update

I am officially up 4lbs and up one belt notch.  Or down one belt notch?  I don't know, whichever one means I had to loosen that bad boy.  Only a quick 22 more weeks to go.

Thursday, January 9, 2014

Happy Belated New Year!!

We weren't fancy for New Year's Eve, but we had fun!


And in the least shocking news of 2014 thus far:  Alex likes champagne.  Surprised?  Me neither.

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Making himself known.

Currently this second beast child is the size of a turnip.  And that little turnip has been causing some havoc.  I was very rarely sick last time around.  This time?  Not so lucky.  And by not so lucky, I mean that I feel sick to my stomach pretty much every time I eat.  Which is a problem.  I really like to eat.  Like a lot.  And it isn't to the point of vomiting or anything like that, just a good half hour of slight nausea.  Kinda like a mild hangover, only without the fun the night before...and it happens each and every time I put food in my mouth.

You think that stops me?  Nope.  So here I sit; kinda wanting to puke.  But that cinnamon bread and those oranges were delicious.

Monday, January 6, 2014

Selfie-Nation just got a little bit cuter...


Over it.

I'm going to add one more to the long list of people that won't stop talking about the weather.  It is freaking cold.  And since it's so cold, school is closed.  But you know what isn't closed when it gets cold?  That's right!  A sales company that sells heating equipment!

Working from home during the heart of heating season whilst entertaining the beast is a challenge.  Good thing I have Mario Kart and How It's Made on my side.  Wish me luck for tomorrow.

Thursday, January 2, 2014

Fixed it.

Alex didn't want to go to day care today.  Given my lack of motivation to get my butt to work, I couldn't really blame him.  Alas, we don't always get what we want.

Yesterday I found an awesome Captain America tshirt for him and I used that as incentive to get him to get dressed.  Yay for new Captain America tshirt day!  But then we got to day care and he decided he didn't want anyone to see his new shirt.  Yeah, ok, that totally makes sense...sure.  He wanted to wear his "extra" shirt that is kept in his cubby in case he gets his shirt super dirty or, I don't know, he cuts some holes in it.  But since I'm a slack ass mom, he currently has no extra shirt in his cubby, so that plan wasn't gonna work.  So, I told him he could wear his shirt inside out if he didn't want people to see it that badly.  Proposal accepted!  We turned his shirt inside out and he trotted off to listen to their pre-breakfast story time.

He's an odd one that one.

Prezzies!

I am completely spoiled rotten.  This was once again proven to me this Christmas and birthday.  Our new house is a tri-level which I really like, but it means a lot of stairs.  And these stairs are carpeted which means a lot of vacuuming stairs.  We got a new vacuum to accommodate the fact that we now have carpet in most of the house, but I really wasn't looking forward to using the attachments/tools for the stairs.  And since I am so spoiled, my mom gave me a new Shark hand held vacuum!  I am super excited, but I'll give you one guess as to who in our house might be more excited about all the new vacuuming possibilities.


After getting the steps done, he kept running up and down the hall pretending the vacuum was so strong it was pulling him, all while shouting, "This beauty's really really strong!"

Simple pleasures.