Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Total control

So we got home last night to find the dog had shredded two mini blinds.  Who knows why...my guess?  The leaves were making too much noise, they were disrupting her sleep, and she needed to intimidate them into silence by showing off her power of destruction.  Now that it is as dark as midnight by 5pm, it was bothering me that the blinds could no longer do their job.  So I really wanted to change them.  But Alex really wanted to finger paint.  Guess whose want won.

While he was finger painting, he teasingly told me he was going to eat the paint off of his fingers.  I told him not to.  Which was stupid.  He is 2...when Mom says not to do something it is like lighting a firecracker under Do It!'s ass.  So he did it.  And immediately started gagging and in turn threw up.  Finger paint portrait ruined.

Shockingly, he didn't want to continued finger painting.  So I pulled a chair up to the sink so he could wash his hands and arms and belly.  At which point, I brilliantly thought that I could take this opportunity of him being occupied to hang some new mini blinds.  I got one of them hung and I came back in to check on him.

Everything appeared fine until he told me he needed to find the money.  Instantly my memory had a flash of a penny that was sitting on the window sill.  So I asked him where the money went.  "I eat it."  When I asked him if was serious, he assured me he ate it and that it was in his belly.  I took a deep breath and about 30 seconds to regroup and I innocently asked where he put the money.  "In my mouf."

In review, my dog shredded about $7 worth of mini blinds, my kid ate finger paint and puked only to later eat a penny.  And, no joke, we had been home for 45 minutes.  I did find the penny under his chair later.  So at least I won't have to look for it in a less than preferred place today.  Win?

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