Alex loves people. Like every single person ever. Which is great. Except for when I have to try to explain to him that not everyone is nice. And that unless I am with him, he really shouldn't be talking to any Tom, Dick, or Harry that walks by. Especially given our neighborhood and the fact that we live right on a bike/walking path. Lots 'o strangers walkin' past our yard.
Most of the people strollin' on by are perfectly nice people. Including the guy that stopped and listened to a long, drawn out story from Alex about Aiden. The guy made the mistake of saying "Hi!" to Alex. Alex launched into a story and the guy just stopped and listened to the story while eating his box of popcorn he had with him for his walk. Alex finished the story with a flourish and claimed Aiden jumped over the fence the previous day. When I corrected him and said that the dog did not jump over the fence, popcorn dude just shrugged his shoulders and told Alex maybe it was a dream. That guy? Totally fine. The guy that parked next to my house, and had his buddy wait in the car while he was picking something up from his "friend"? That's decidedly not totally fine.
Any way, the other day, I wanted to go upstairs and change my clothes and he wanted to stay outside. So I told him he could, but he had to stay inside the fence and he wasn't to talk to anyone. He just looked at me all confused and asked why he shouldn't talk to people. And as I explained that not all people are nice people, I watched a little sparkle in his eyes fade while sadness seeped in. I understand that he needs to learn this fact of life, but it still sucks.
Part of the reason we are trying to move is our neighborhood. 95% of our neighbors are really nice people. But the 5% that aren't nice, are really not nice people. Who have really not nice acquaintances. And unfortunately, the level of not nice outweighs the nice. It didn't used to. When it was just Travis, the dog and me, I could easily ignore the not nice. But not anymore. I don't want to live somewhere that makes me uncomfortable to leave my child outside in a completely fenced yard while I run inside to pee.
But then there's this: We are moving from a very diverse community to a small town. And the loss of diversity makes me sad. I love the fact that we didn't have to actively teach Alex that being gay or black or in a wheelchair or having spiked purple hair is totally fine. We didn't have to teach him that because he sees it everyday. He sees different people and he sees that even though we don't all look the same or walk the same or talk the same or like the same things, it doesn't matter. At all. I love that. But now we are planning a move to a town that doesn't have that. And I got all freaked out and was positive Alex was going to end up a racist homophobic redneck that hated his left-wing nutjob parents. But then I started thinking about where I grew up. I grew up in a very rural area with pretty much zero diversity. And I'm not a racist homophobic redneck. Weird how when you have good people raising you, you don't turn out to be an asshat.
What it really comes down to for my little freaky brains is that I guess I would much rather Alex have to learn to stand up for what he believes in when confronted with someone with different beliefs, than have him have to learn to which gang signs mean what. But then will that make him a naive easy target later? Gaaaaahhhh!!! Being an adult is hard.
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