Tuesday, June 8, 2010

The Power

It never ceases to amaze me how an 11 month old child has complete and total control over my emotions. That may speak to my lack of control of my own emotions, but I am choosing to believe he has the ability to achieve a Vulcan Mind Melt if necessary, so clearly he controls my emotions.

Alex spent the weekend in Platteville with his uncle, aunt and three cousins. He really really likes it there. He gets undivided attention from three boys, and the aunt and uncle don't exactly ignore him. He gets new toys and new clothes, and gets told how cute he is approximately every 0.4 seconds. So, it's kinda like going to Grandma and Grandpa's. Which shockingly, he also loves. Anyway, this past weekend was no different. I called to check in Friday after I left. I could barely hear the assurances that everything was going great due to the excited baby screeching and belly laughing in the background. K, I am getting to the emotional control finally....

When I dropped him off, he could have cared less that I was leaving. He was sitting in the middle of the living room floor surrounded by his cousins. Mommy who? It made me a little sad, but I was happy he was going to be happy for the weekend. But then...then Sunday came and he came home. I went to greet them outside at the gate. Julie was carrying Alex. When I saw him, he kinda smiled. And when I reached for him? When his mother reached for him?...He buried his face in Julie's shoulder. Mommy's world...successfully shattered.

This brings us to this morning. He loves me again! My "littlest piggy cried weeeweeweeweewee all the way home" made him giggle and drool out his morning bottle. He didn't cry while I was changing his diaper and clothes. As a matter of fact, he actually was "talking" to me the whole time. He snuggled me when I picked him up out of his crib. And we had a wonderful conversation the whole way to daycare. Cloud 9.

And then he cried and was reaching for me when I left daycare. In a fraction of a second, cloud 9 disappeared. But hopefully this means he will be excited to see me this afternoon!

Added note after re-reading:
The reason I was knocked off cloud 9 when leaving daycare is that I feel guilty when he is sad when I am leaving.

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