The other day, I saw a post about a kiddo that was upset that some other kids called him a name. If I could remember what the name was, it would help the story, but we will say the kids called him stupid. And instead of asking who said it or asking more about the situation, the parent asked, "Well, are you?" The kid said no, and the parent then talked about knowing yourself and not worrying about what other people think because you know who/what you are.
I thought it was an interesting approach, and I actually got to try it out last night
Sam was all sorts of upset because some kids at school called him "Chucky Sam." (I have no fucking clue what that is supposed to mean, but Sam was upset about it.) I was thiiiiiiiiiiiiis close to asking who said it, but then I didn't and I just asked, "Well, are you Chucky Sam?" He was still super pissed and yelled, "NO! I'M SAM!" So I said, "You're right. And they are wrong about who you are. Does matter more that they are wrong or that you know that you are Sam?" He started explain yelling that he was still mad because they are saying he's something he's not, so I told him again, "Yes, but you know who you are. And that is what matters." He sat for a minute, and then all of sudden stopped crying and smiled and said, "Yeah! I know I'm Sam! And it doesn't matter what they think because what I think about me is right!"
You guys, I swear I almost passed out. Now, I'm not saying this will be a lasting lesson or anything, but dang if it didn't work! I rarely take parenting advice to heart, but this is a keeper.
And while I was basking in this parenting win just now, Alex brought me right back to reality with, "Moooooooom! I broke the sink!"
Fantastic.
I thought it was an interesting approach, and I actually got to try it out last night
Sam was all sorts of upset because some kids at school called him "Chucky Sam." (I have no fucking clue what that is supposed to mean, but Sam was upset about it.) I was thiiiiiiiiiiiiis close to asking who said it, but then I didn't and I just asked, "Well, are you Chucky Sam?" He was still super pissed and yelled, "NO! I'M SAM!" So I said, "You're right. And they are wrong about who you are. Does matter more that they are wrong or that you know that you are Sam?" He started explain yelling that he was still mad because they are saying he's something he's not, so I told him again, "Yes, but you know who you are. And that is what matters." He sat for a minute, and then all of sudden stopped crying and smiled and said, "Yeah! I know I'm Sam! And it doesn't matter what they think because what I think about me is right!"
You guys, I swear I almost passed out. Now, I'm not saying this will be a lasting lesson or anything, but dang if it didn't work! I rarely take parenting advice to heart, but this is a keeper.
And while I was basking in this parenting win just now, Alex brought me right back to reality with, "Moooooooom! I broke the sink!"
Fantastic.
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