I had a couple errands to run on Sunday, and since the other adult in our household had a self-induced stomach ache, I took the boys with me. The first stop was Alex's haircut. All went well until Sam pooped. I went into the bathroom to change him and there was no changing thingy on the wall, so I put the little changing mat I have on the floor and put Sam on it. And he was pissed. Screamed the whole time I was changing him...in a very echoy bathroom. Oh well.
As we got into the car after the haircut, I noticed a tear in my jeans. Right at the bottom of the zipper. I noticed this because I could see my red underwear through it. Now I had a decision to make. Go the four minutes back to the house and change my jeans, or take the chance that the tear wouldn't go any farther and my shirt was long enough to cover it. Oh, I took the chance. But the sad part is what swayed me...I really really didn't feel like taking my shoes off to change my jeans and then have to retie them. That was what sealed the deal for me. I am not proud of that.
The next stop was the bookstore. All went well there and I managed to not show my underwear to anyone. Including one of Alex's day care teachers who was there as well. This bookstore is in the same strip mall as Noodles. Alex saw the Noodles sign, gasped, and asked if we could have lunch there. Here's the thing: he loves Noodles. But 97% of the time we go, he ends up throwing up in the bathroom. Usually it's because he's taking too big of bites. Sometimes I think he just likes the excitement. Other times I think he does it out of habit. But rare are the times we make it out of Noodles without a dramatic sprint to the bathroom. I told him we could go, but that he had to promise to take small bites the whole time because we had Sam with us and I couldn't leave Sam sitting on the table while I ran to the bathroom with Pukey McPukerton. He promised, and again I found myself taking a chance I wasn't sure was going to pay off.
We ordered, found a table, got situated, and awaited the arrival of our food. Within seconds of sitting, Alex very loudly asked, "Why does it smell so bad in here?" I tried to quietly explain to him that he was smelling the perfume of the lovely elderly woman sitting behind us. "Why would someone wear that much yucky smelling perfume?" he shout whispered. I don't know honey. I would have moved to a different table, but there were a scant few open, and we had the stroller and car seat in addition to the two of us. I was certain the yucky old lady smell was gonna make this kid vomit. I reminded him to be polite and we went back to waiting. Once the food got there, he was very conscious and verbal about taking small bites. And he did really well until the very end. He took a huge forkful of noodles and looked at me with slight panic. I calmly asked if he had too much in his mouth and instructed him to spit it back in his bowl. I did that calmly while terror streaked through my body like lightening. I did a quick survey of our fellow retaurant attendees, located the nicest looking one, and was seconds from asking a complete strange to keep an eye on my sleeping baby while also not stealing him. Luckily, I did not have to call on the hopeful kindness of strangers...with a few sips of Sprite, Mr. Alex was right as rain.
You'd think not dealing with puke would be the highlight of lunch. And it was right up there, but Alex topped it with the following conversation:
Alex: Mom? When I'm a grown-up, will you still be alive?
Me: I'm planning on it.
Alex: Are you sure? 'Cause that's a long time.
Me: Well, I'm a grown-up and Gramma and Grandpa Z are still alive, so see?
Alex: K. 'Cause do you remember that thing we were talking about?
Me: No...
Alex: Ok. It's just that I always want you to be with me.
Me fighting tears with every fiber of my being: I will always be with you buddy.
And that was only topped with a purchase of a remote control Yoshi that can climb the walls. Yes, I know it's almost Christmas and he's spoiled and I shouldn't have spent the money and I should have made him wait. But...it's a Yoshi that can climb the walls. That shit was comin' home with us.
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